Hike #20: The Apartment Hike–Second Installment

con’t from previous post…sorry for the delay

This next stretch would take us through the Tenderloin, under a freeway overpass, and up Potrero Hill.  Fueled by celebrity gossip and Bud Light, we attacked this leg with a vengeance.  But no sooner had we walked down the hill from Molly’s place and into the Tenderloin did we see….our second red double decker bus.  What it was doing in the Loin, I do not know.  But we hustled our way into the nearest bar, which just happened to be…

Bar Stop #2: Harrington’s Pub, the Tenderloin

“Smells like cigarettes and omlettes.  My superior deduction skills tell me it stinks like cigarettes most likely because they let people smoke inside. As for smelling like omelettes… shit, I dunno.

~Yelp review, Harrington’s Pub

Indoor smoking, toothless patrons, and “Michael Collins–the Lost Leader” posters lining the walls…Harrington’s is exactly what you would expect an Irish pub on the corner of Turk and Larkin to be.   But we were on a schedule, no time to dawdle…5 minutes and 18 Bud Lights later, we were back out on the street and moving.  We had gone less than two blocks when we ran into…red double decker tourist bus #3.  NOOOOOOO

Apparently the Tenderloin is a tourist hotspot.  Unfortunately (fortunately?) we were heading towards Market and 8th, an area that doesn’t have a whole lot of bars, so we couldn’t get to one immediately.  But within a few blocks we stumbled across…

Bar stop #3: Holiday Inn Hotel Bar, SOMA

I am not entirely sure this bar was meant to serve non-guests (we had to prop the bathroom door open with paper towels because none of us had a room key to open it), but the bar was deserted and the bartender, Mandy, loooooooved Molly, so whatever. After a little bit of confusion regarding orders, Mandy hooked us up with some beers (Molly and Eden got strawberries).  With a chug and quick mugging with Mandy, we were on our way.

Upon walking out the door, there was a collective gasp as…yes.   A FOURTH double decker tour bus drove by–our third bus in about 8 blocks.  Lucky for us, it was blue, not red.  Close call.

OK!   Through the scary parts of town and free of tour buses, we headed towards the I-80/ 101 underpass–Freeway Crossing #1.  Erickson did the favor of providing us with a plethora of Bubblicious flavors for the bubblegum rule.  I think we all underestimated exactly how wide the freeway is, because the only person who came close to making that goal was Erickson.  Carl also made a concerted effort, but everyone else gave up after a few tries.

With the failed gum freeway crossing attempt behind us, we were finally on our way to our next scheduled stop.

Sixth Stop: Ferg’s, Potrero Hill

For the final push of this stretch we had to make it up Potrero Hill, which is hard to do when you’re not 9 miles and 8+ cocktails deep.  But with some major effort the whole team made it to Ferg’s apartment where we were greeted by large bags of Doritos and some more Bud Light.  Just what the body needs after a strenuous climb.

We enjoyed the view, stretched, prepared ourselves for the next leg, which would also be relatively long, and headed out West and towards our…

Seventh Stop: Summer & Ryan’s, the Mission

Over Potrero Hill to the second freeway crossing (where Molly and I were the only two to even unsuccessfully attempt the three legged race….rules were slowly falling by the wayside) and through the Mission (aka Baconwrappedhotdogcartland) we went.  Chadeyne came across a liquor store that sold cutty bangs. In need of a refreshing beverage, most of us imbibed.  And almost barfed.

Another mile (and without bacon wrapped hot dog cart incident) later we arrived at Summer and Erickson’s, where Summer had been so kind as to order up some Papalote burritos, which were DELICIOUS and exactly what we needed to motor us around Twin Peaks, through our longest leg, and to our final destination…

Eighth and Final Stop: The Hesslers, Inner Sunset

At 3 miles, this was the longest leg of our trip and it definitely felt like it.  The sun started to set, the group started to spread out…but about an hour or so after leaving our
seventh stop WE ALL ARRIVED!

Though Chrissy had to work the whole day and was not able to join (a major bummer), she and Carl (who had joined us at Harrington’s) were kind enough to open up their home as the final stop.  Pizza, beer, and a beautifully decorated funfetti cake wrapped up our tour, where 7 of the original 8 hikers (plus an additional 10 or so hikers that were picked up along the way) celebrated victory…then went home and fell asleep by 9:30.

Finish time: 8:30pm, only 90 minutes behind schedule

Lessons learned: 14 miles goes by quick when you’re dodging red double decker tour buses

Flora and Fauna: the cutty bang

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