100 x 100

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In high school, the hardest swim practices of the year were always on Thanksgiving Day and New Years Eve.  These were the kinds of practices that you (or, at least, I) dreaded all year, the practices where I spent the entire night before tossing and turning in bed because I knew that 3-4 hours of god-awful torture awaited me on the other side of that alarm clock.

And being the empathetic coach that I am, I wanted to share that experience with my adult masters team.

Sundays, at 2 hours, are our longest workouts of the week (early morning practices are only 90 minutes).  So I generally use Sunday mornings to get in a little extra yardage, usually somewhere between 5000-5500 yds (weekday mornings usually hover around 4K).

Earlier this year, as a throwback to the club swimming years, I thought it would be a great idea to shoot for a challenge set towards the end of the year.  I had planned to gradually build yardage on Sundays throughout the fall until, at the last workout before the holiday break, we’d reach the pinnacle set of 100 x 100s–for a total of 10K (math skillzzz)–and everybody would enter the holiday season in a wild blaze of glory.  Great plan.

Well.  Turns out this negligent coach hasn’t coached at all since September.  Which means that the masters team has not been building up yardage as originally planned.  In fact, I don’t even know if they’ve been doing the full 5,000 on Sundays.

But I had mentioned the set to the head coach and Allison a while ago, and both of them loved the idea.  And so, despite the lack of preparation, we got the OK to use the pool for an extra hour and decided to push ahead and do the set.

The set (this version largely stolen from Hillary Biscay, with a few minor adjustments):
*b = your base, so if your base is 1:30/100, b+5 is 1:35, b-5 is 1:25

Warm up
3 x 100 @ b+15
3 x 100 kick/drill by 25 @ b+20
2 x 100 @ b +10
2 x 100 @ b

8 x 100 swim @ b+30
25 sprint/25 stroke easy/50 easy

7x:
2 x 100 @ b+5
2 x 100 @ b
2 x 100 @ b-5

2 minute break to regroup, drink some water, etc

6x:
5 x 100 pull or swim (your choice) @ b+5, descend 1-5
# 5 on these should be FAST

5 x 100 @ b+20
25 sprint/25 stroke easy/50 free easy

5 x 100
50 kick/50 easy swim @ b+30

So this past Sunday we went for it.  And by “we” I mean Allison and one other swimmer finished the whole set.  (I, personally, had not been in the water in over 2 months and jumped in on the 7 x (6 x 100s) on a base of 1:25 and did *most* of that sub-set.  I had to make a few of the 100s 50s when I started losing feeling in my arms.)

Even though most swimmers didn’t finish the whole set, a huge number stuck through 6, 7, 8K of the workout said that it was the longest swim they had ever done in their lives.  So…success.

I was actually pretty bummed I couldn’t do the whole set.  Might have to give this another try in the spring.

Squirrels Gone Wild

Flying Squirrel 1

A few days ago I was booking it home on the final stretch of a run (Paul was starving and wanted to make something called Meatball Nirvana) when something very large fell from the sky and landed on the sidewalk about a foot in front of me, causing me to scream and throw myself onto a nearby lawn.

When I was in high school we were standing on the deck of the pool one afternoon when a dead seagull fell out of the sky and landed right next to my sister. Honest to god. It was one of the weirder things I’ve ever seen happen in my life.

What almost landed on me during my run was not a seagull.  Obviously.

You know how squirrels make those death-defying leaps between trees 20 feet up and somehow always seem to make it?  Well, this one didn’t.  I have never seen that happen before.  Amazingly, it was fine.  It stood there stunned for a second, looked at me, then turned in a few frantic circles before it scampered back up the tree to probably do exactly the same thing.  Because squirrels are stupid.

I spent the rest of the run wondering if squirrels carry rabies and what would have happened if I were a faster runner and the squirrel had landed on my head.  I’ve had a bird attack my head before while running (true story, ask Paul, he was there) but never a mammal.  The perils of running.

P.S. Picture via here…a website called News for Squirrels.  Really.  How much news can there be.

Twice the fun

IMG_20131106_112028I went for my run a little later than usual this morning, and the crossing guards for the local elementary schools were out.  They guarded me when I was crossing, which I thought was hilarious (because I’m not 3 feet tall) but also made my day.  It’s the little things.

The trees are out in full force.

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And leaves rain down on you.

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Paul is interviewing for residencies right now, and there’s a chance we’ll be back out in CA next year.  I think about that on these runs.  If we do move, I will miss running here this time of year.  A lot.

IMG_20131106_111259Speaking of running in the bluegrass, Margaret just sent me an email and let me know that she has registered…

Run the Bluegrass

…for Run the Bluegrass at the end of March!  Guess that means two races for me this spring.  I AM SO EXCITED!

Dark ‘n’ Stormy

IMG_20131031_113953“Watching” the World Series.  

We all hit a pretty big wall about mid-week.  Except for a tiny someone.  Going back to work is taking its toll.

Today is super dark and stormy.  Appropriate for Halloween, right?  Or so you’d think.  Turns out it can be TOO dark and stormy.

Trick or treating has been cancelled tonight.  Seriously. The mayor made the announcement this morning.  I had no idea that mayors had that power to re-assign holidays.  Apparently they do.

I’ve decided to celebrate anyway by spending some quality time in the lactation station freaking myself out.  I have a short run on the docket for after work, but with the storm outside it probably means a treadmill run.  So the odds of that happening are…slim to none.

So on this dark and stormy night  I will probably go home and watch Donnie Darko.  And maybe dress HH up in the 4-sizes-too-big pea pod costume that Marsha got her at the baby consignment store for a dollar.  Because I don’t have enough energy to do much else.

Happy Halloween.

Update: Peapod costume fits!  Trick or treat success.

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Someone just said it looks like Paul is holding a stuffed animal.

Back on the Horse

SLO half

Sticking with my MO, my longest run in the past 8 months has been 5 miles (and I’ve since backed off because of pain), I still haven’t figured out how to fit a normally scheduled workout into my workday when I’m not sleeping more than 3 hours at a time, and I live in Kentucky.  But am I going to let that stop me from signing up for a 13 mile race in California?  HECK NO.

All registered and ready to roll.

Week 2

IMG_20131003_134335I took this picture on our front stoop as I headed out on my run on Friday.  Should I be surprised that I got caught in a torrential downpour?  (I actually really like running in the rain, except it does a number on your shoes and any electronics you might be carrying…which is why I almost always run with a dog poop bag for my phone.  Also comes in handy for other types of emergencies.)

SO!  Week 2 of exercise is in the books.  Unfortunately, after my last run (“run”), which was 5 miles, I started to have a little bit of that old shin pain that has plagued me for years.  God…

And so, last night I decided it was time for a change, I was going to take advantage of this clean slate and be responsible about these injuries and stop them before they start.

First: Even though it’s not a crazy distance, a friend of mine made a good point that jumping from 3 to 5 miles in 2 weeks is a significant increase in mileage (percentage-wise).  I think she’s right.  So I am waiting a few days until I feel no pain at all before running again, and when I do start up we’re going back to shorter distances.  Build slower.

Second: I realized that my shoes, even though I didn’t run much the past 6 months, have quite a few miles on them.  Time for a new pair.  Ordered them on Zappos (but the older model…so much cheaper).

With those two decisions made i was feeling pretty productive.  So my new super-proactive self decided the next step would be to establish a cross training/strengthening routine to prevent further injury.  I have some exercises I’ve done in the past, but it was time for something new.

So I Googled “shin pain from running”, compiled info from different sites (mostly from Dr Jordan Metzl’s videos from Runners World), and put together a routine of butt/hip/core strengthening exercises.

With my list written out, I changed into my living room exercise outfit (booty shorts that no longer fit, a tank top with coffee stains that I can’t wear in public, and my slippers) and proceeded to do a modified (it was, after all, my first day) version of the exercises, including plyometric (that soon turned into non-plyometric) squats and lunges.  I did about 1/3 of the squats suggested with less reps and more rest.

ANDDD!  …today I can’t walk.  My legs kept randomly giving out on me as I made the bed this morning.  I didn’t eat lunch until 4 because the baby was in “I’m going to scream if you put me down” mode and was worried that I would fall over with her in my arms squatting to get something out of the fridge.  And forget sitting down.  Paul heard me fall onto the toilet in the other room and thought something horrible had happened.

So, yeah.

And we’re back…?

running-shoes-300x200

First post-baby run, in numbers:

  • Miles: 3
  • Time: ~30 min
  • Distance I got before I stopped in pain, turned around, and went back home to put on a second sports bra: 1 driveway
  • Turds taken by Spike: 2
  • Turds I kept willing Spike to take during the run so I would have an excuse to stop: 15
  • Gallons of sweat I had to wash off my body when I was done: 8 (aprox)
  • Leg cramps: 4
  • Times I considered stopping and walking: one million
  • Level of wanting to die due to both physical and psychological distress, on a scale of 1-10: 12

In my defense, it was really humid out.

Human Buoy

getty_rf_photo_of_pregnant_woman_swimming_in_pool

I haven’t taken a picture of myself in the water yet, so we’re going to pretend that the above picture is me and not a stock photo off Getty Images, and that I look this graceful when I swim now.

It is kind of amazing, you really do ride super high in the water when you have this much fat on you.  And since people have been constantly asking me what I can and can’t do in the water now that I am this shape and size…

Things I can do:

  • Freestyle
  • Flipturns (harder to do when wearing a pull buoy)
  • Backstroke

Things I cannot do:

  • Breastroke kick
  • Butterfly
  • Get out of the pool without using the ladder (this was a painful, embarrassing lesson to learn)

In addition to the swimming part, I have taken it upon myself to very conspicuously waddle back and forth in front of the tan, skinny, bikini-clad 15 year olds flirting with the teenage pool guards at least 2x per pool trip and soak in the looks of combined fascination/horror, selflessly serving as cautionary tale for what can happen when you make certain life choices.

My work here is done.

The (D)evolution of the Exercise Regimen

MyCollage_020 weeks vs. 35 weeks

What a difference 15 weeks makes (the light in our bathroom is terrible, which is why the picture quality is so crappy.  And why I look like a pixelated vampire albino in one of them.)

Much like the rest of me, my “exercise regimen” has morphed pretty significantly in the past 9 months or so.  I don’t think I fully grasped before how difficult it would be just to move when you’re shaped like this.

But anyway, in a nutshell:

Months 0-1.5:

gross

  • Running: finished up my training and ran Smokies Half Marathon in Gatlinburg hoping for a PR.  Almost barfed/passed out/died at the end (see above, mile 12.5) with a sub-par time and had no idea why I felt so horrible.  Found out a few days after the race.

Months 1.5-3:

peacock-yoga

  • Running: Started training for the NYC Half (which I had already signed up for and been awarded a slot), but left my watch at home to avoid feeling any sort of pressure to pick up the pace.  Just nice easy miles.
  • Yoga: Continued with hot yoga, after the OK from the doctor (it wasn’t Bikram, the room is around 90, the doctor said it was fine as long as I drank a lot of water and didn’t spend too much time lying on my back).
  • Swimming: Kept swimming sporadically, would do the full workout (usually 4-5K), felt sluggish but could still hang.

Months 3-4.5:

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  • Running: Ran NYC Half right around 18 weeks at a really smooth, comfortable pace, felt great during and after the race, no problem (aside from sorer-than-usual stomach muscles the following week)
  • Yoga: Got kicked out by the instructor.  Bummer.
  • Swimming: 3000-4000 yards about 2x a week

Months 4.5-6:

  • Running: Kept jogging/wogging a couple of miles at a time a few times a week.  But around 6 months that resulted in a strained round ligament, which made rolling over in bed and general movement painful, which turned into me being like F-U RUNNING, I H8 U 4 EVA!!!!!  Some women run throughout their entire pregnancy.  Not me.  No more running for a while.
  • Swimming: Per the doctor’s encouragement, really tried to focus on getting in the water regularly, swimming 3-4x a week.

Months 6-7.5:

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  • Walking: start walking to work when I could, or doing “longer” (3-4 mile) walks after work if I don’t have time to walk in the morning.  It’s a nice alternative to running, gives me a chance to catch up on my podcasts.
  • Swimming: OUTDOOR POOLS OPEN!  Which means long course.  Distance starts to decline, but still try to go 3-4x a week.
  • Video: And then, I do something I never ever thought I would do: pull out my stretchy cords, try to push all of the thoughts about how ridiculous I look out of my head, plop myself in front of the TV and start doing an exercise video.  But it’s OK, because it’s the Summer Sanders Prenatal Workout DVD (damn you Amazon and your targeted advertising) and Summer Sanders is Summer Sanders (and it cost me $8, including shipping.)  Right?  I’m skeptical, but do like some of the stretching and upper body strengthening stuff, so I do it maybe once a week.

Months 7.5-9:

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  • Walking: Thanks to an old injury, SI joint started to SERIOUSLY flare up around week 32, and plain old walking becomes horribly, horribly painful.  Like, almost-start-to-cry-when-crossing-the-street-because-I’m -not-sure-how-I’m-going-to-step-up-to-get-back-on-the-sidewalk-when-I-get-to-the-curb kind of pain.  Getting from the office to the parking lot requires at least 15 minutes of mental preparation.  So I go to the PT, who tells me, “Sorry, your back isn’t going to get any better until after the baby comes.  The best you can do is try to stop it from getting worse.”  Ugh.  No more walking.  But fortunately…
  • Swimming: …the outdoor pools are still open!  Start going to the pool 5-6x a week.  I use the word “swimming” here loosely: I use my arms and legs to get from one end of the pool to the other.  Distance per “workout” gradually declines, but I make just getting in the water a priority.  There’s not a lot of structure to what I do, I don’t push myself at all, the point is to take some of the weight off and stretch out and move a little bit.  And, of course, get my tan on.
  • Video: With walking totally out of the picture, I throw myself full force into the 45 min workout video.  I now have the entire video memorized and can do it on silent while I watch episodes of Orange is the New Black.  My past self would totally be judging my present self.  And I don’t even care.  Paul is like:

3uls0p

…and that’s where we are.

Going on 37 weeks, I’m down to maternity videos and floating. But it turns out minimal walking + more swimming = back pain GONE.  Yes, that’s right.  I can waddle like a normal human being, and it is such a relief.  Stairs are no longer my worst enemy.  Things are looking up.

I’m also convinced the continued “exercise” has helped my sleeping.  Well, that and the pillow.

So yes, my feet are like sausages, getting up from a reclined position requires superhuman strength, and I need Paul’s help taking my shoes off…but I really can’t complain.  Things haven’t been that bad.  And while I know that is largely due to genetics and luck of the draw, I do attribute at least some of my good fortune to the fact I have been able to keep moving–however slowly–in some way, shape, or form.  It’s not always pretty, and I know for a fact that my two-piece suit has thoroughly offended the old ladies in the water aerobics class at the Y.  But it makes a difference.

An object at rest

Time for a little science.  Let’s go back to high school physics.

Force =  Mass x Acceleration

or

A = F/M

So, what happens when mass gets bigger:

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…and force gets smaller?

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This.  Acceleration rapidly approaches zero.  Add some 90 degree heat with humidity on top of that, and you may actually experience negative speed.

And, as usually happens when I sit on the couch in my sweats for extended periods of time (see: here and here and here), running a marathon suddenly seems like a SUPER FUN idea and I want to sign up for a race.  Or 10.  I know it won’t happen for a while, considering I can’t even jogsuffle across the street right now, but I’ve started putting together a potential list of races for next year.

Speaking of moving, the Oatmeal just published one of his best posts yet (which is saying something) about why he runs long distances.   Worth the read.

But for now, it’s more of this:IMG957983

And swimming, swimming, swimming as long as I can.  Just about a month to go.

In the meantime…find a way to silence your Blerches.